Don't Want to 'Go See My Doctor'

The first thing these websites always tell you when you have a question about something is, "Go see your doctor." I knew that would happen. I don't want to go see my doctor, I want to see some ideas about what I want answers about and figure it out without going to see my doctor. Why does this country have such an obsession with doctors? How did we survive before we had this addiction to doctors and prescriptions? I am sorry. I think the only time I am going to go to the doctor is if I am very ill. I don't want to see if I might have some terrible disease. I'm going to die one way or the other. Is living longer the goal of all this? I am not obsessed about living longer. I am going to live as long as I'm going to live, and then I am going to die. Sorry if that sounds morbid. It's just the way it is. I don't have a relationship with my doctor. She always wants me to go have blood tests done. I don't want to have blood tests done. They are a waste of time and are not at all helpful. I do not want to be told about my carbs or my cholesterol or whatever. I remember when my grandmother, my mother's mother, had gone to the doctor and they told her she had too much sodium. Well, I don't care to go to the doctor and have her tell me I've had too much sodium. She ended up with Alzheimer's and died. I don't remember what year. The information is in a Bible at the house where my estranged brother lives. I could go try to find my grandparents' graves and that would surely tell me. I'm not sure either of them were yet in their 80s. I know my granddad smoked himself to death, and my Nana did not smoke, but they both died in about the same decade if I remember correctly. I think they may have died in the 1970s, but I'm not exactly sure. I am going to try to find out now. I might just call the cemetery and ask them. I imagine they would have the record without me having to go to the gravesites. I have never been big on going to gravesites. I know a lot of people are. They regularly go and decorate their loved ones' graves and all that. I never did that. I think maybe some folks on my dad's side of the family did it. One of my cousins decorated my paternal grandparents' graves and her parents' graves. I have a friend who decorated 40 graves every Memorial Day. I just never did all that. So I'm getting older and people are dying all around me. A bunch of people from my high school class have died, I don't know exactly how many, but it seems like more and more of them all the time. We just lost another one over the weekend. So, that's just what each one of us has to look forward to. I actually think we should be more worried about preparing for eternity than trying to see how long we can live on this earth. I'm going to die when God decides it's my time to die. That's what I believe, and every day I need to simply do the best I can to live for Him. He takes care of me that way. So, I have just been wondering why I'm hungry all the time. I'm not hungry at the moment, but my stomach is full, and I feel fat. If I want to know why or what I can do about it I can research about a dozen or more articles online about it, but I'm not in the mood now since that one from some health center said, "Go see your doctor." Nope. Not doing that. Seems like I eat all day. I start off with cheese and peanut butter crackers about mid-morning. Today I also had a bag of snack mix with peanuts and dried cranberries. Very yummy, then my beef and bean burrito with pepper jack cheese on it and milk for lunch. By then I felt pretty stuffed. I came home and drank a big cup of tea and ate two Vienna Fingers and six licorice allsorts. I ate a salad from Dillon's. Spinach, apple, pecans, cranberries, carrots, very delicious, and now I feel fuller and fatter. I still want to drink a cup of "golden milk" before I go to bed. Later on. I eat pretty much the same like that every day and then I take Juice Plus. That way I don't worry about having to eat 13 vegetables and fruits every day. And some other nutrition supplements, but I won't bore you with that. I look forward to seeing my grandparents in heaven. I'm pretty sure they were all Christians. There were more Christians back in their day than there are today. That's unfortunate. Instead of people preparing for eternity, today everybody is just trying to look younger and not die, if they can help it, which nobody has yet been able to do, and I know there are people out there nutty enough to think they can cheat death as soon as somebody invents some product that can extend life forever. That is not going to happen. So now everybody's all worried about the economy. Funny how they weren't worried about it when the Biden administration and prior administrations were stealing us blind. Well, I'm not worried about anything because Jesus keeps telling me not to worry. What's there to worry about? I am going to live from day to day and pray for everybody I know who does not know Jesus and try to be a witness for God and live right before Him and leave the rest in His hands. Yep, that's what I'm going to do. Well, I need to go start settling in for the night. One of the reasons for being hungry all the time is supposedly lack of sleep. That's what I've been trying to change in recent days. I need to get better at it. Gotta close. Goodnight. Love, Carolyn