Can't Keep Track of Paper

I have to try to find a car tomorrow. I had that car I wrecked for 15 years. It was beginning to be a burden to keep having things done to it, and it was worn out, but now facing the task of finding a replacement is really daunting. I guess I had hoped that little car would last forever, and I have almost accepted the reality that it is not, and maybe the next one won't either. I really want one just like it, but that probably won't happen either. Funny how you get attached to a car. But now it's dead and soon to be buried, to join a junk heap somewhere. Perhaps some parts will be useful, who knows? Anyway, it's gone, it's not going to be driven again. I had to go fish stuff out of the glove compartment today, hoping the title was in there, thinking the title was in there. The glove compartment was jammed shut, and no one had been able to open it before, but the people at the towing business got it open. It was both a blessing and a curse. I had hoped to see the title in there, but what I thought was the title turned out to be an old registration receipt, that said title on it, and that is why I thought it was the title. Honestly, I thought the title was in there and all that needed to happen was for someone to get the jammed shut glove box open. So, the blessing was that they got the thing open, but the curse is, I now have to go apply for a copy of the title for the insurance process to be completed. So, I was hanging onto a false hope. I also didn't know that you were supposed to keep the paper the registration sticker comes on every year. I didn't know that. And now I felt shamed because I didn't know that. Someone once said about me, when asked what couldn't I do, that I "couldn't keep track of paper," and that was demonstrated again today. I can do a lot of things, but I "can't keep track of paper." I don't think that is something I should necessarily feel ashamed about, but I did feel ashamed about it. I already feel ashamed that I got a speeding ticket and totaled my car. People were kind to help me with rides when my car was having a door replaced, but I have to get my own wheels. Obviously, I can't keep relying on people to give me rides. It's only been one day. The car died yesterday. Tomorrow, God willing, I will get another one. The rental situation seems to be another conundrum. I found out also today that although debit cards can be processed as credit cards, they aren't credit cards, and my bank will not allow me to use a debit card to rent a car. I don't want to rent a car. I want to buy a car. It seems to me that the insurance should allow me to rent a car without having to give a $200 deposit as well as apply for and wait for a credit card before I can even rent one. But it doesn't matter what I think is fair or just. They have set an amount they are willing to pay, why don't they just pay for it? They've been taking my money out of the bank for months. I don't get it. Not having a car is not an option. I can't even get to the DVM to apply for a copy of the title of my old car without a car. I can't even get to the bank to apply for a credit card without a car. Well, actually, I can walk to the bank, but I can't walk to the DVM. I could but it would be quite a long walk. So, you see, we can't all do everything. And I will not hang my head in shame because I don't have the title of my totaled vehicle. I have gone along for years as a law-abiding citizen and have not had to have a copy of my title. I am not a secretary, or an accountant or a bookkeeper, I am just a person who likes to paint, play music, write, speak Spanish and teach children to read. But I can't keep track of paper. I am going to say my prayers now, and earnestly petition God for a car tomorrow. Goodnight and God bless.