What is a friend?

January 1, 2025. You know, often it doesn't take long to figure out someone's political persuasion when you look them up on social media. It's funny, though, there are those who seem to be able to pull off a complete "I'm not tellin'" probably because their mode of operation (aka MO) is either to completely avoid the subject or to please both sides of every issue. That way you can deceive more people into believing you're on their side, and you can grow thousands of "friends" that way. Just a little bit of cynicism to start the year off right, right? And why would I look somebody up on Facebook? Not usually, but only when I get a friend request from someone who has a mutual friend whose politics I am already aware of. I get friend requests often enough (not that often) from people who have mutual friends whose politics are clear. Why do I mention politics now? Because I don't want to accept a friend request from somebody and then find out that they are rabidly the opposite of me on the subject of politics. Number one, because I don't want to argue and number two I don't like being unfriended. I would rather be the one doing the unfriending if that is what needs to be done. Better yet is to avoid the likelihood of either by not accepting the friend request. Got it? I'm sure you do. Historically, I have been unfriended mostly by people who are offended by my posting Scripture verses, but, you know, many of the people who remain my friends on Facebook do not particularly relish Scripture verses, nor do they relish religious rants. I think God probably has a way of maintaining a certain amount of equilibrium regarding this, but it has been a long, arduous process. I can't tell you how many times I have been unfriended by people I know face to face. They hurt the worst, but you get over this rejection. “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity” (Proverbs 17:17). So, a friend is, first of all, someone who loves at all times; therefore they will not "unfriend" you. If they "unfriend" you, obviously they are not your friend. They might be someone you work with or someone you went to high school with or someone you have known in your past, someone in your hometown you run into at the store from time to time. You are not going to bare your soul to this person. This is an associate or an acquaintance, but not a friend. But it's not really all about rejection. We've all experienced rejection. It's a part of life, and we get over it. It probably gets easier as we get older and more experienced, wiser, perhaps. We just move on through the giant maze of social media frenzy. But that doesn't mean we want to invite rejection. I am afraid I'm going to get a little bit too deep for some people on this subject so I'm going to try to turn a corner. There are just so many possibilities with social media--so many layers of meaning that they represent. I think most people just genuinely want to share ideas and talk about things they care about with likeminded others. I remember Dave Gardner said once a long time ago, "Strangers are just friends you haven't met yet," and I've heard that expression again, lately, by I don't remember who or where. Some I know who are Christians want to use social media for evangelism, and that's a perfectly good way to use it, I think, as long as you don't hammer people over the head with it, which is possible to do, in case you don't already know that. "I am become all things to all men, that I may by all means save some," the Apostle Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 9:22. This is a principle I like because it is so practical. I feel like this is something I can do, as in, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13). And now, all of a sudden, I have the urge to eat popcorn. If Pat were here I would probably be watching a movie and eating popcorn because that's something person-to-person (face-to-face) friends can do that social media friends cannot. So, first requirement for friends is that they love you "at all times." Therefore, people who unfriend you are not your friends, never were your friends. The second requirement for friends is that you can watch movies with them. This only applies to face-to-face friends. You can't very well do that with social media friends. So, if you can't watch movies with social media friends, what can you do? Most of you already know how to do that very well. You just share your thoughts online. It's not the same as having a conversation, but it has its own charm. Okay, so why am I writing this? I am writing this because I am in the process of trying to figure out what it is I am supposed to be writing about. I am finding out that if I have my Bible handy, God will give me ideas that he apparently thinks are important. So I am just following up on that. I am first of all a friend of God, and next a friend to others and (not necessarily in that order) a friend to myself, which is very necessary for me because I live alone and no longer have a pet. That means no one to fix food for or talk to or anything like that. I rather suspect that some of you I'm talking to right now might be like me in that respect. So, I'm getting ready to conclude here. I've just tried to share some ideas about friendship, in general, and online. Not trying to be hyper-analytical or give any kind of formal compare and contrast or anything like that, just talking about it, and if you have ideas, I welcome those too. I am not trying to sell myself, I am not promoting my book, I am not trying to sell my book, even though this is appearing on my "author page" as well as my personal page. My stomach is telling me I really don't have any room for popcorn in there, so I'll just leave it at that, and I don't have to worry about washing grease off my hands. I have had a lifelong tradition of watching a movie at 10:00, ever since I was a kid living at home, before I went to college. I don't always do it, but I always think about it. I don't have cable so I can't watch Turner Classic Movies, so if there's a movie I want to watch, I google it and find out if it's available on TubiTV. Or I might find something on TV with my antenna. I am always thinking about ways to save money, I mean always, day in and day out. I have done this as long as I can remember. I suppose that maybe comes in part because of Mom always complaining about how the child-support was never enough. I don't know, but that's just something that has become somewhat of an obsession with me, I guess. That's terrible, probably. So being as today marks the middle of the second week of Christmas break, and I really want to make good use of this time, I think it's time for me to go see if I can find a free movie to watch. Maybe if I get up and walk around a little bit, my stomach will tell me it's okay to put on some popcorn. I'll let you know if I find one to watch. And so ends the first day of the New Year, well almost ends it. It's not ended yet, but this web log is ending now. Thanks for listening, all five of you (some of you read the blog but I don't see you on social media). I hope you have a friend. This is not an invitation for someone I am not friends with on social media to comment how beautiful and interesting my posts are, and would I send you a friend request. Just saying.