What Christmas looks like when family is gone

Here it is, December 21, 2024, only four days until Christmas. I am thinking about all the things people have said about Christmas as long as I can remember. One of them is, "Christmas is all about family." There is a time in most Americans' lives when this does seem to be the case. Most older Americans can remember a time when they went to Grandpa and Grandma's every year. All your cousins were there. Nowadays they have a lot of things people post on social media, or games you play at group gatherings where you play that "White Elephant" game where people can take the gift you just opened and liked. The questions go something like this: What was your most memorable Christmas present? "What is your favorite Christmas memory?" or, "What is your favorite Christmas movie?" Well, you get the idea. I don't remember any Christmas presents I got at those family reunions at Christmas. Not a single one. I just remember a lot of good food Grandma fixed, a beautiful Christmas tree with icicles on the tree that used to have lead in them so they would hang heavy instead of like a feather, the way they are now. Oh, I don't know. What I remember most about these days is a lot of little kids who saw each other once a year, and loving the whole thing. And then there were the other Christmas gatherings that you had with just your immediate family. I don't remember those either, particularly. I have photos of Christmases after the divorce, with the two step-siblings. And after the divorce there were the gatherings with each parent and whoever else might be included. I don't really remember, to be honest. It's kind of all a blur. And I definitely don't remember what presents I got. I love getting presents for people. I enjoy getting presents from people. It's fun, but it's not particularly memorable. These things for me are just tokens. They are usually little things or clothing. I remember my dad's second wife used to wrap up practical things like boxes of Kleenex or cans of soup, things like that. I always thought that was kind of cool. Some people who, when they ran out of wrapping paper, would wrap presents in the funny papers. People got tired of the whole thing back then just like they do now. And we were not loaded with money. I don't remember getting a horse for Christmas or a puppy or--there was something I wanted for Christmas and never got. It was a horse on wheels. When I see one, I remember that. But I always had what I need, and I have what I need now. Hopefully, when you get older, you begin to realize what Christmas is really all about. The memories all involve people, because people are what it's all about. It's all about Christ, and Christ is all about people. Why else do you think he came as a man and lived a life with people to show us the way? So I don't feel too bad about not remembering my favorite Christmas present or have a favorite Christmas memory. I do remember my favorite desserts: Sandies and Welsh Cakes. They were not just for Christmas, of course, but Christmas was a time for baking if no other time was. And this has stayed with me. I make Sandies because they melt in your mouth and they are fantastic with tea, and so are Welsh Cakes. Of course, I think of my grandparents who are gone, my parents who are gone, my sister who is gone and my brother who is far away. We share our favorite Christmas movie: "A Christmas Carol" with Alistair Sim. I think of him watching it and wish we could watch it together. I remember how beautifully my estranged brother decorated the Christmas tree and how we took turns opening up presents, but those days are over because he decided not to speak to my brother and me again after our mother died. Am I going to cry about that and let it ruin the holidays for me? Of course not. Why? Reason number one: Jesus is the reason for the season. He is the focus. He came for me, to be my constant companion and my champion and my guide. He is joy and peace and love. Second reason: Christmas is about people. There are people in your life, whether or not you choose to have anything to do with them. So, now that everybody's gone out of my life except my one cousin who lives here; that is, no immediate family members around anymore, I have two ways to occupy myself while everyone else is doing what they're doing. Number one: enjoy life. Number two: enjoy people. I had a great time at school giving away gifts and enjoying the last day before break. Lots of crafts and the singalong at the end of the day are every year holiday traditions at our school. And now I will enjoy several days off and exchange gifts with a small number of people, and go to church. There are any number of Christmas Eve services going on around town I can choose or not. There are Christmas movies to watch. I am not going to have time to be lonely or depressed. I know there might be people seeing this sometime who are going to be alone this Christmas. Well, apart from all these things I have noted, there are other things to do that you can do. You can go to the community Christmas dinner the Salvation Army puts on. I haven't done that, but I might do that one of these years. You can eat a Christmas dinner at Cracker Barrel. Christmas is celebrating the coming in the flesh of the Creator of the Universe, which should bring joy to everyone, but people are rebellious and self-absorbed, and, this year, especially, politically absorbed. Hating one another, the Bible says, in Titus 3:3. That's what the world does. It's tempting to want to jump on the hate wagon, but it's particularly inappropriate when we should be honoring others, not hating them. "For we ourselves also were sometimes foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving divers lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful, and hating one another" (Titus 3:3). "Honor all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king" (1 Peter 2:17). There are going to be some troubling times ahead and very emotional for everybody, I'm sure, politically speaking, for sure, so I hope we can take these next couple of weeks to enjoy the company of others, however that applies to you, and look to Jesus for the strength and comfort that you are looking for. I know at least one person who is a self-identifying hermit. This, to me, is inconceivable. Although I am not the most gregarious, outgoing, charismatic person on the block and am comparatively introverted, I greatly love people. And I love children. This latter did not come naturally. I did not particularly care for children before Jesus changed my heart. That is why I didn't have any in my earliest child-bearing years. I had it all wrong. I thought music was my life at one point, and the fact is that music is not life. It is a gift from God but it is not God. So, I am just saying that it is Jesus Christ who has filled my spirit and made me able to live fully and completely in this world without all the things I thought were life to me. This included worldly ambition, the world's definition of success and even children and grandchildren, which most people my age are always talking about. I love the children I work with, I love the adults I work with, I love the people who run my apartment complex, I love my mail carrier, my atheist neighbor, my pastor and his family, my church friends and strangers at the thrift store, and I love you, people who read this and Facebook friends. I feel sorry for people who are depressed at Christmas. I do not condemn you. I completely understand and have experienced all those emotions. It's just that Jesus is the answer to whatever your question is. You have to let him take away your sin though. I am not sure why that is so hard for everybody, but I assume that's why so many people are fighting against God. So, enjoy these next four days. Don't get too caught up in the stress of buying and wrapping and cooking and cleaning and whatever else you have planned. Enjoy the life that God has given you and lighten up a little on the politics, if only for a few days...